Every Woman Needs...

I wish I could find this list my friend's stepmom "Mary" had of things she'd decided over the course of her life that every woman ought to have. I should enter the caveat that this was created from her worldview - that of a straight, white, late-middle-aged, Southern, Christian woman with a fantastic sense of humor and a heart rivaled in size only by her picnic baskets full of the best pies you've ever tasted. That said, as I try to remember her list, change the wording as you see fit according to your worldview. Since I can't remember them all, I'll take this opportunity to add some of my own based on what I've collected or found myself wishing for.

Mary's list included some of the following:

• A pair of diamond earrings
• Appropriate footwear for all occasions
  
• A man who wasn't good enough for you, but you dated anyway
• A man you dated only for his looks
• A man you loved, who did not love you back
• A man who loved you, but you did not love back
• A piece of real jewelry you bought for yourself
• A place you can retreat to, whether a friend's kitchen table or your own garden, where you are always welcome and can be your true self

There was quite a bit more, but that's all I remember. By that checklist, I'm doing okay. I have all of those crossed off but one, and I reckon someday I'll be able to afford real jewelry.

Some things I'd like to add from my experiences, that I think every woman (if not every person) would benefit from:

• A friend in whom you can confide anything - someone you can really trust to never betray even your deepest, darkest secrets
• Self-defense training
  
• A man you can think of when you're about to say, "I hate men," who makes you remember that there are good ones out there
• Someone who can be trusted to give you a good haircut
• A love letter*
• A reliable road atlas
• A friend who will tell you the truth, even if it isn't what you want to hear

*maybe you don't care about that kind of thing, but there's just something about the thought of seeing words in real ink on real paper you can hold in your hand, words that can't be backspaced or retracted, saying that at least for one moment in time, someone loved you enough to give that moment a little permanence. This is the one thing from that list I have yet to collect.

I didn't mention anything about the kind of guys or gals you should love or have relationships with because frankly, everyone's needs are different. It'd be a whole other post to go into the massive education I've had on my own in the past few years.

What would you add to Mary's list?